Bios on The Magnificent Seven Old West Seven
Credits and Thank Yous
Program of Events for Awards Night
Ask the Seven
Tanner's Poetry Corner
Fun and Useful Cowboy Links
Welcome to the eighth annual Mistresses of Malarkey's (MoM) Magnificent Seven Fanfic Awards Ceremony.
To start with, none of this could be possible if it were not for the fan favorite TV series called The Magnificent Seven.
Who would have thought that a little western would be capturing the fans’ hearts and imaginations after all this time,
and that it would still be inspiring more new AUs every year? Secondly, let me re-introduce you to the
original Seven who made the show so "magnificent". The previous years featuring the various AUs have been fun,
but we felt it was time to get back to the grass roots of the fandom and revisit the old west.
I would like to take a moment to thank the many individuals who helped make our eighth Annual
Mistresses of Malarkey (MoM) Magnificent Seven Fanfic Awards a tremendous success and a lot of fun.
Many thanks go to. . .
for their incredible help with all the behind
the scenes work.
and updating the various awards web pages.
and keep writin'!!
This night could not be possible without you!!
Thank you for your support!!
Rhonda (Luna Dey)
Welcoming Remarks by Mistresses of Malarkey's List Mom Rhonda
BEST GEN Stories (The One Destiny Award)
Presenters: Rhonda & OW Ezra
TEARJERKER (The Embroidered Hanky Award)
BEST GEN TEARJERKER BEST ADULT TEARJERKER
Presenters: Mal & OW Josiah
BEST HURT/COMFORT (The Golden Crutch Award)
BEST GEN HURT/COMFORT BEST ADULT HURT/COMFORT
Presenters: OW Nathan & ATF Nathan (written by Maggie)
BEST ADULT- HET
(The Ace of Hearts Award)
BEST ADULT- SLASH
(The Wild Hearts Award)
AU OTHER THAN ATF (The
Brass Mirror Award)
Presenters: Lady Viper & OW Buck
Presenters: Sue M & ATF JD
BEST HOLIDAY FIC (any
genre) (The Glad Tidings Award)
Presenters: Janette & OW Chris
BEST HUMOR (The John Dunne Award)
BEST ADULT HUMOR
(The Loaded Gun Award)
BEST GEN GIGGLES- HUMOR (The Gen Tickled Award)
BEST ADULT GIGGLES - HUMOR (The Adult Tickled Award)
Presenters: Maggie & ATF Vin
BEST LITTLE BRITCHES (ATF OR OW) (The Little Britches Award)
Presenters: LB Chris and Buck
BEST KID FIC GEN (any genre/non-Little Britches) (The Little Tykes Award)
BEST KID FI ADULT (any genre/non-Little Britches) (The Kindred Souls Award)
Presenters: Lisa S & ATF Chris
BEST SEQUENTIAL FICS (any
genre) (Mag7 Serial Award)
Presenters: ATF Josiah & Orin Travis (written by Mal)
BEST VIGNETTE (40K or less) (any genre) (The Magnificent Ficlet Award)
BEST GEN VIGNETTE BEST ADULT VIGNETTE
Presenters: Sarah & OW Vin
BEST EXTENDED FIC (250K or more) (any genre) (The Best Novella Award)
BEST OW GEN NOVELLA BEST OW Adult Novella
BEST AU (including ATF) GEN Novella BEST AU (including ATF) ADULT NOVELLA
Presenters: OW Mary & OW Inez (written by Laura)
BEST NEW AUTHOR (any
genre) (The Rising Star Award)
Presenters: Rhonda & AT Ezra
Presenters: Rhonda & ATF Ezra
You've know Buck for a long time, but you two are so different. How have you managed to stay friends despite
your very different personalities?
Curious in Denver
I ask myself that same question all the time. The best answer I have is that back before I was married I was
a lot more like Buck than I care to admit sometimes. Those times, and the fact that he stuck beside me through
the worst time of my life, make us more like brothers than friends. We all know that brothers fuss and fight,
but they are always there for each other. That's how we've stayed friends.
How do you do it? I'm a guy who loves the ladies, but every time I turn around one of them is trying to trap
me into marriage. How have you managed to stay single and still have women falling at your feet?
A fellow stud in Albuquerque
Once a lady has had a chance with Ol' Buck, they never want to go back to second best. I've had my share
who want me to settle down and get married, but I just turn on the charm and let my animal magnetism do its
work. They soon realize that tying me down would change me and I wouldn't be the 'fun' Buck they know and love.
That usually puts the thoughts of marriage right out of their heads. Hope that helps.
You are a spiritual man, but I notice that you also believe in signs, like when you saw the crows. How do
you justify believing in both God and earth based religions?
A believer in Spokane
One thing I learned from growing up a missionaries son is that every culture has its own customs and beliefs,
but deep down most of them have a common thread. They believe in a supreme being that is the creator of
all things. Mixing parts of various religions is a way to get the best of every religion I learn about and that
makes me feel balanced. As for the crows, they are seen as a harbinger of death in many cultures. Luckily
in my case they happened to be wrong.
I am sure you have gotten yourself into some tight situations with your gambling. Looking back, what is
the funniest thing you had to do to get yourself out of a tight spot?
An admirer in Atlanta
There is no doubt that I have seen my share of tense situations and have had to be creative to extricate myself
unscathed. I think one of the funniest, upon looking back, was when I had to pass myself off as a saloon girl
to sneak out of the saloon where I had lodged while practicing my craft. I had been a rare run of bad luck and
found myself unable to pay off a bet. It was hard to keep from revealing my disguise when some dusty,
liquored up, cowboy pinched my derriere as I flirted my way toward the door where I could make my escape.
Have you ever had to experiment on yourself to figure out what herbs benefit particular ailments? If so,
did you experience any times when you wished you hadn't?
A nurse in Richmond
I was lucky to learn a lot when I was a stretcher bearer and even more from people I have met along the
way who shared their knowledge. But, to answer your question, I have had to try some things on myself to
see what they would do. I had heard of using Sienna for that 'blocked up' feeling, so one time when I experienced
that ailment I tried a tea made from Sienna leaves. Not the wisest move I had ever made. I should have used
the pods which are much less potent. Needless to say it did the job too well, and I ended up practically living
in the little house out back for most of day and a half.
Have you ever thought of opening your own tracking business? You're so good you could probably use the motto,
'I always get my man'.
Bounty Hunter in Wyoming
Dear Bounty Hunter
I 'm not the kind to be tied down to one place too long, so it ain't likely that I'd ever start a business.
That would mean sendin' down some deep roots. I do offer my services to people who need help,
so I earn enough to get by. I don't know about the motto you mentioned. Kinda makes it sound like
I'm out lookin' for men for other reasons.
I think you are so cute! I just wanted you to know I am available if things don't work out with Casey,
My question is, what is it like being part of a group like the Magnificent Seven?
Blue eyes in Boston.
Dear Blue Eyes,
Awww shucks, Ma'am. (I guess you are a Ma'am) You've made me blush. Good thing Buck isn't here to see that
or he'd be teasing me something awful. I guess the best way to describe bein' part of this group is it is like having
a big family with lot's of brothers. We all pick on each other, but any of us would lay down his life for any one of
the others. When my mom died, I thought I would be alone after that, but instead I found a family. Now I have
to go find Buck so I can rub it in that he is not the only one with animal magnetism.
(Haiku by Antoinette - in honor of this year's luau theme)
Cowboy jokes (rated PG 13)
Cowboys and Gunslingers
The Cowboy Code
Cowboy hat facts
Cowboy Stories and Poetry
Four Corners Institute of Lexicon Development. Now accepting applications . . . learn from the best . . .
President and Founder, Ezra P. Standish. Why say two words when ten will do!!
* * * * * * *
Sign up now for 'Kissing 101" . . . This intensive-filled 6-week class will show you the proper techniques for
writing the perfect kiss fic . . . Long hours of research and lip-to-lip practice will be required. Study partner
is definitely needed. Register now before the class fills up!!
* * * * * * *
"Do you think being Sheriff is easy? Well, it ain't . . . I've got outlaws, thieves, robbers, and psychos to deal with.
What helps me through it all? Milk. Yep, cowboys drink it. I drink it.Got Milk?"
* * * * * * *
Poise and Posture classes are now being offered by Four Corners' resident gambler, Ezra P. Standish. Expect
nothing less than the best!! Now accepting applications.
* * * * * * *
For Sale: Beautiful purple dress. Worn only once . . . in excellent condition. See Mr. Standish.
* * * * * * *
For Sale: Frog gigger. Never been used. Will accept best offer. See Sheriff Dunne.
Stains Be Gone Cleaners . . . we can get out any stain or you get your money back . . . from those pesky
bloodstains from shootouts to those lipstick marks from passionate interludes!! Prompt and friendly service
is our motto!! Now serving the greater Four Corners area. . .
* * * * * * *
Bones Set, Wounds Healed . . . Come to 'a Healing Touch Clinic.' Advice free of charge.
* * * * * * *
Coming soon to a local entertainment venue near you. . . Ladies, like the cowboys? Come on down to Lady
Killers All-Male Dance Review. . . Whether you like 'em in black from head to toe, younger, distinguished,
or a smile that'll make your knees buckle, these boys know how to get you back in the saddle again and ready
for an all night rodeo!!
* * * * * * *
Sanchez's Construction . . . We can build or repair anything at reasonable prices. No job too small!!
* * * * * * *
Trying to track down a lost artillery wagon, loved one, or a cheating spouse? Come to Tanner Trackin',
we'll track down anybody. . . Retainer fee a low $5.00
WANTED 'Bad Element' SWM . . . prefers the color black, cheroots, whiskey, and riding bareback.
WANTED SWM Church contractor who loves to work with hands, hates crows, and can get "Old Testament" on occasion.
WANTED SWM Bounty Hunter who plays the harmonica, likes poetry and the great outdoors, and occasionally gets "wild and wooly."
WANTED SBM . . . a kind, caring healer who has the magic touch. Must also be an expert knife thrower.
WANTED an Ace of Spades . . . SWM Gambler who loves dark, smoky saloons; high-stakes poker; and hates "menial labor" and "tar and feathers."
WANTED SWM enforcer of the law, greenhorn, and milk drinker. Must be able to ride, fly, and swim. Also must be able to provide his own frog gigger.
WANTED SWM with "animal magnetism" and red long johns . . . must be tall, handsome, and knows how to treat a lady.
Mistresses of Malarkey
Hosts of the MoM Awards eight years running!
Stop by and read
our talented writers’ stories!
To hot to go
outside? Snowed in? Bored? Home sick? Looking
for a few cowboys?
BLACKRAPTOR.NET, only place where you can peruse over 4,500
stories in a multitude of Mag 7 universes.
And Proud Cosponsor of MoM Awards
The series may be gone, but the stories remain.
Find out where the writers have taken our Magnificent Seven men in their adventures.
May the fandom ride on!
Always accepting submissions, stories & artwork
Email: Demon Bunny Press
Did you ever
wonder what JD and Vin might have been like as
We've got over 500 tales from various authors and AUs/genres.
So come on over and visit us at LB archives at BLACKRAPTOR
and let us take you back in time!
Do you feel lucky?
Read the Mag7/Las Vegas stories of The Montecito Seven
Mag7/LasVegas yahoo group at: http://tv.groupsyahoo.com/group/Mag7LasVegas/
Just Remember . . . What Happens in Vegas, Stays in Vegas